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Nice Weather, eh?
By Tim Blackstock
You finally got in line for the fountain behind the hottie from the soccer team. He glanced at you, noticed your existence, and you shrank like a prune inside. He drank his fill, he even gargled, and he half-smiled as he took one last look at you. You shrank farther into a raisin.
Great. Now you have to wait another two decades to get this close to him. When that time comes and he still has hair, here are some ways to strike a conversation:
Strike 1. Act like he's supposed to know you from somewhere.
That is, if he doesn't know you yet. Give him a little smile (not the big, overeager one that makes you look like an idiot), and say "hey" - as if he's such a loser if he doesn't remember who you are. Remember to look confident when doing so because the success of this strategy depends on how natural you act. The casual approach would create the most comfortable moment for you and Mr. Hottie. A line that goes, "Don't I know you from somewhere?" may help, especially if you do know him from somewhere. Or you could just say right out "Hey, John." The gesture would make him know you're interested, or would make him interested. Or both, if you're lucky (you might want to check your stars in the morning paper before hoping for the latter).
If he ignores you, you've lost nothing but two to ten words from your mouth. You can easily recover by learning ten new words in the dictionary. At least you tried.
Strike 2. Be interesting.
Get a hobby. Be passionate about something. Make sure that it's something you really want to do. Shine in that field, and you'll be getting yourself some serious attention. Plus, if you really know what you're doing, you won't be humiliating yourself.
If you're part of a charity project or an organization, you can get him to join or find out more about the club when he drops by the booth. You can easily talk about the project you are currently working on when you catch him at the bus station. He won't only be knowing something about your affiliation, he would also be finding out more about you. Who knows, maybe he's always liked to plant a tree as well and he'd join your Plant-a-Tree project.
It would also be easier for him to talk to you if he is interested in what you're doing. Hobbies are instant conversation starters. You go through a list of hobbies one at a time, and you find out which one you have in common. And if it doesn't work, at least you're keeping yourself entertained.
Strike 3. Be interested.
Do not try to imitate his expertise just to catch his attention. If he's good at basketball, you don't have to join the basketball team just to impress him. You already know you'd make a conspicuous idiot by trying too hard. Besides, some guys (and girls too) find it freaky to have someone copy their actions. If there's no chance at all that you'd like to be directly involved in his activities, be interested in them.
Chances are you're already interested in basketball. If the guy you like is a player, you've probably attended several games, but you'd like to know more about this shot and that, this move, the works. It's not embarrassing to ask the simplest questions in scoring or in calling a foul. Guys feel good and important when girls care about what they care about. When you ask questions, it would let him know that you're interested.
Try to ask about his dream car, his favorite team, and even his favorite food. Get to know him better this way. You'll be getting clues as to what he really is all about and if he's worth your attention. After a good while, he'll be asking about your favorite movie, your favorite restaurant, and your phone number.
Strike 4. Be in the know.
When they said in the old days that knowledge is power, they weren't kidding around. It's never harmful to arm yourself with common knowledge like current events, the latest songs, movies, happenings, and what-have-yous. Wouldn't it be a shame if he asked you what you thought about this national issue and you had no idea what he was talking about? The same thing goes if he asked your opinion about this new band to whose concert he has front-row tickets. Starting a conversation this way is safe - you don't try too hard by discussing his interests, and you don't alienate him by talking about yours. Common knowledge is common grounds. You'd most probably be both concerned, and each of you would have an opinion about it. You can have a good debate where your opinions differ. As longs as you don't pull each other's hair, arguing your point lets him know you're not just trying to please him.
Topics like these are not only a good way to start a conversation, they also keep the ball rolling. If you'r lucky, you'd be updating each other on new events.
Strike 5. If all else fails, there's always the weather.
Now don't underestimate the weather. Aside from making or breaking a wedding, the weather is the most casual, most common thing to comment on. You can never go wrong by saying "Nice weather, eh?" unless, of course, there's a blizzard outside and you're just waiting for your building to get hit. Still, some guys think sarcasm is sexy.
You can say things that are surefire attention-getting: "The sun feels good on my skin today." He won't only hear your words; he'd also notice the warm glow of your cheeks. This works well on a beach and when you're getting a tan, but it doesn't matter if you're too pale because he'd know you're in good spirits today and that you feel good about yourself.
Whatever you decide to do, remember to be confident about yourself. You don't start a conversation with your eyes on the floor. Unless you're hitting on the floor, guys and girls alike appreciate a smile that says "I know what I'm doing, and I like talking to you." Once it starts, keep him talking, laughing, and the conversation rolling.
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