|
|
Am I wasting my time with this guy?
I met a guy via a chatroom, we became close and talked on a nightly basis for the most part.He lives about 3 hours away. We really became close friends and decided to meet. (three months later) Iwent to go see him and stayed with him for the weekend, we had a great time and he seemed to represent himself honestly.
He seemed to pull away after I came home and calls less. (he stated he was overwhelmed with me coming for the whole weekend as he wants things to go slow) I had asked him as I sensed this.
He is 36 and currently living with his parents. Yeah..oh boy! We have discussed things and I have gone to see him one more time since our first visit. He states he doesn't want to get in a relationship right now with anyone as he is enjoying his personal time with his hobbies but cares for me and would like to hang out, enjoys me as a person and stated if I wanted to have sex he is open to that but it won't lead to a relationship just because we do. He said things could change tomorrow but this is how he feels now.
Am I wasting my time with this guy? I feel I have put too much effort forth at this point anyway.
Is it just he is not that into ME.....is why he doesn't want to get involved. Or could it be that he seriously is in a place where he is not ready for a relationship and there still may be a chance down the road for something? He tells me he is not the right guy for me then tells me to move down to live closer to him??????
Confused and hurt.....
Dear Confused and Hurt
I understand the confused part, but not so much the hurt. There's nothing to be hurt about. This is a guy that has told you he isn't ready for a relationship...and he certainly isn't. He wants to have his cake (or his Mom's cake) and eats yours, too. If that's not what you want, then tell him you appreciate his honesty but you're ready for a relationship and you wish him luck in the future.
He's a user that's used to having things done for him and he wants you to be just where he wants you - not where you want to be. Don't be hurt, you weren't fooled or misled - he's just not the guy you need.
It could all change tomorrow, in which case he's free to call you and take his chances that you've moved on...which you should do.
Related Articles:
Any advice on how I can get her moving?
Any advise on how to get to the truth?
Are looks really all that important?
Are there any situations you can think of where cheating is acceptable?
Are there signs you can look for to prove your significant other is cheating?
Are there telltale signs that someone might be an abuser ?
Can you give me a clue as to what is going on?
Could it be my friend is just jealous?
You can reproduce DrDating's advice column on your web site, blog or publish them in your ezine/newsletter free of charge. All we ask is that you include the copyright message at bottom of each Q&A and ensure there is an active link back to http://www.DrDating.com
The advice provided on this page is for entertainment purposes only. Rabbit Rabbit Ltd can not be held responsible for accidents, damage, losses or misfortune incurred as a result of following any advice given on this page. See Full Disclaimer for further details.
|
| |
