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Is scheduling sex a good thing?
I am an attorney and am trying to make partner. This doesn't give me much time to spend with my girlfriend who I've been dating for a little over two years. She says she understands what I'm trying to do and she is supportive of it, but I should learn now how to schedule time to be with her or with whomever I'm with. She says we should schedule date nights. I always thought things like that should be spontaneous and I don't want to treat my relationship like a business dealing. Is scheduling sex a good thing?
That's a smart girl you have there. How in the world did you date someone without scheduling it? You scheduled your dates, didn't you? My husband and I still have date nights the same as we had fifteen years ago when we met. They don't always end in sex, but it's time the two of us set aside to spend with each other and nothing interferes with unless there's a family emergency. We may push the hour ahead or behind, but every week we go out on a date. Of the two of us, I'm the one who is more likely to need to reschedule and I've learned over the years how important Thursday evening is to him. It has to be a very serious family emergency to make us forego it.
Listen to your girlfriend. You will come to appreciate the steadiness of having something you can call your own and is your own private time with someone who wants to spend time with you. Just because it's regular doesn't mean it has to be a ritual. Schedule the date night and on that first one, I suggest you get her something special for having your back.
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