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Old Flames and Past Relationships
By Jo Robinson
You first met when you were in high school, when you were teenagers who knew little of the outside world. You consider him as your first love - fist puppy love, that is. You went to different colleges and didn't work it out. You broke up with him and lost touch since then.
Five years later, you're finished with school, struggling to make a modest living. You went through your own share of short-term relationships, never seeming to find the right one. And then at a friend's party, you meet your high school puppy love again.
Old flames will always have the elements of time and surprise. "Time" because without the time spent apart, the person wouldn't be an old flame. And "surprise" because old flames have a tendency of suddenly bolting into your life, impeding your judgment, and making you conjure up day dreams of ending up with your first love - first puppy love, that is.
I've always been a fan of great love stories; those that are of fairy tale material that make you swoon and go "awww." And the story of ending up with a first love turned old flame is definitely in the Top Ten. There's an "awww" factor in the thought of coming back to an old flame after the years apart, of doing a full circle and ending in the very place where you started. There's a swoon factor in exploring other relationships and realizing that you had everything you wanted in your very first one.
For this fairy tale to come to life, the surprise element would have to be set aside and the time element would have to be considered. The time of the two lovers apart didn't pass by with just a blink of an eye. Their time apart means years without their presence in each other's lives. It means change in the personalities of the old flames.
When you meet an old flame again, don't expect him to act like a sixteen-year-old boy. He will be different, just like you will be. You would have to get to know him again and realize which of his sixteen-year-old traits were softened and which were hardened with time. He will be a totally different person, who you might love, or might not.
In a way, old flames are not really old. Time makes them new people. Having an old relationship doesn't mean you can have a new one in an instant. Old flames can't promise an old relationship with an old boyfriend. It's always something new, because people and relationships are changed with time, especially with time apart. The only thing that old flames can promise is that you wouldn't have to do small talk on each other's high school lives anymore, because you've been through it tog
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