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Do you think I had sex too soon?
I met this guy at a party and we talked with each other for most of the night, and danced as well. He asked me to go out with him and we went out a few nights later. We really did hit it off well; so well, we had sex that first night. I saw him again a few days later and we had sex again. My girlfriends are surprised because I don't usually have sex this soon in a relationship, but I do like this guy.
I told him I don't usually have sex this early and wanted to know if he considered this a sex only thing. He said he felt an instant connection with me as well and it isn't just a sex thing.
I'm worried I did jump in too soon and if I were to slow things down, he would walk away. Do you think I had sex too soon?
Brett
Dear Brett
There will be no way of knowing because you did in fact have sex with him that first and second time. And not to be too cynical, but what was he supposed to say when you asked him? "Yes, we had sex too soon but as long as you're offering, I'm taking?"
There are no supposed to in relationships that apply to every one - that was obvious when you did something you don't normally do.
Give yourself a break. If you both had that spark, then you had it. And you acted on it. If it is a decision that brings you pleasure, doesn't disrupt who you are, or in anyway makes you less than, then you can enjoy it for what it is now - and for what it can become; either a better relationship, or a memory.
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